I've never been this emotional before.

Hi people.
It's been a boring yet sleepy week this time yeah.
People's falling sick one by one and mostly are due to stress and such.
I've been beginning to fall back to my old ways.
Now I don't feel as happy as before truthfully.
I don't know why.
And when I see the bond between me and my cliques are fading far beyond my reach.
It's like the feeling of having friends is gone.
I know it would happen as we were already in seperated ways, leading our lifes but,
I still want to believe that there is such thing existing... "Friends Forever."

Okay I'm really sorry for typing these craps out.
You guys shouldn't read my blog at all. I might as well just close it down..
I'm seriously tired and I don't speak often in class anymore.
I don't know what I'm thinking but I just feel that I need peace and serenity,
somehow or rather..

I want my life back as a teenage with friends and being happy once again.
Could I achieve this dream once more?
Being ignorant and oblivious.
This is what it meant.
You're transparent and invisible to this harsh reality. This cruel and painful world.
THIS OBLIVIOUS WORLD!


Why I see many of my friends breaking down but I'm not? Or is it existing but not in the reality but deep down in my heart? Isn't it more painful to hide all this stupid and painful feelings right deep down in my heart than just venting and letting all of them out? But I can't do it, tears just wouldn't come out and I know i can be strong... or is it not true? I want all this stupid things to end now, now, NOW!!